Boundary Script Builder | Ashé Counseling & Coaching
Ashé Worksheets № 03

The Boundary Script.

Approach Relational, gentle
Estimated time 15 minutes
Best for A conversation you've been avoiding

Setting a limit can feel impossibly hard until you've written down the words. This worksheet helps you build a script — one piece at a time — for the conversation you've been turning over in your head. Take your time. Edit as you go.

Private to you. Your responses stay on this device. Nothing is saved or sent to Ashé.
i. Name the relationship

Who is this for?

Name the person and the relationship. Sometimes just writing it down makes the stakes clearer.

ii. Identify the territory

What kind of boundary?

Boundaries aren't only about saying no. They can be about time, body, money, energy, information, or how you're spoken to.

iii. The observable pattern

What's been happening?

Describe the pattern without judgment, the way a journalist would. Stick to what's observable.

iv. Speak from your experience

What I'm feeling.

Name the emotion as your experience — not as a verdict on them.

v. State the limit

What I need.

Specific is kinder than vague. Clear is more loving than careful.

See examples
  • I'm not available for calls after 8pm on weeknights.
  • I'd rather not discuss my dating life with you.
  • I can't lend money right now, but I love you and want to help in other ways.
  • If the conversation goes here, I'll need to step away.
  • Please don't comment on my body, even as a compliment.
vi. Honor the boundary

The follow-through.

A boundary without a follow-through is a wish. What will you do if the limit isn't respected? Keep it within your power.

Why this matters

A follow-through is not a punishment — it's the action you take to honor the limit. It's the only part you can actually control. Don't write what they'll do; write what you'll do.

Your draft
— Read it aloud once —

This draft is editable. Change the words, rearrange, soften, sharpen. Make it sound like you.

vii. Prepare for the response

What I might hear back.

Pushback is normal. Anticipating it makes you less reactive in the moment. What response are you bracing for — and how will you stay grounded if it comes?

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